We’ve all heard people say it …

“I’m such a hoarder.”

“My mom’s a hoarder. You should see her basement.”

“Don’t look in that closet — my husband’s a hoarder.”

Sit down. I want to share something really important with you. It may come as a big shock.

Are you ready?

Now that you know the difference you can start modifying how you describe your acquaintances. For example, instead of saying, “My mom’s a hoarder.” You can simply state, “My mom has hoarding tendencies.” And yes, there are ways of rating how extreme someone’s hoarding tendencies are. Check out the Clutter Image Rating Scale.

I don’t want you to misunderstand why I am writing this blog and why I am being so bold in making this statement. I learned this truth from a Hoarding Symposium held in 2015. I believe that people who have severe hoarding tendencies can break through their affliction if they are self-motivated. In our years of experience of working with individuals with hoarding tendencies the only successful work was done with those who wanted to change their behaviour and were not being forced into change. 

Before you let the term Hoarder just roll off your tongue remember you cannot tell from physical appearance who has hoarding tendencies and who doesn’t. You could be unknowingly making someone feel shame or discomfort by joking around with the term. And if you do know someone with hoarding tendencies the best behaviours you can have towards them are: being empathetic & showing concern, setting clear limits, and using a great deal of patience. The most problematic behaviours you can have towards them are: being frustrated, supporting the disorder, making excuses for a loved one, and associating relationship dissatisfaction.