Dealing with emotional attachment to stuff doesn’t have to suck.

Dealing with emotional attachment to stuff is a very common challenge for people journeying through the process of getting organized. Whether you’re feeling stuck, downsizing, moving, or just needing a change in your space – you are not alone. In fact, we’ve explored the topic of why we form attachments in the first place.

Is having emotional attachment to stuff bad?

I hesitate to say a firm no, that having emotional attachment to stuff isn’t bad. However, if you find yourself having an emotional attachment to every object you encounter, I would challenge to ask you if you have a strong understanding of who the real you is?

It is completely normal to have emotional attachment to non-living things. Just look how children form relationships with their favourite toy growing up, playing make believe, having crisis moments when that toy disappears, etcetera. Adults are no different in their ability to create relationships with their belongings – though tantrums are lesser as we age, right?

How can I declutter if I have emotional attachment to stuff?

Set yourself up with the right expectations and go easy on yourself. If you have experienced difficulty with attachment for most of your life, change is not going to happen over night. The good news is that by understanding what you want to achieve, where you want to go, and allowing yourself realistic time to process getting organized, you will.

3 Ways to help declutter through emotional attachment

ONE: Develop the right mindset

Success often lies in understanding the potential outcomes to undertaking your goal to declutter. Now is the time to think about all the positive outcomes that could occur if you get organized. For example, easier to tidy up every day, a bit of revenue gained from selling unwanted items, etc.

In order to avoid major upsets along the way you must also imagine all the challenges that you could face getting organized. For example, dealing with buried grief attached to an inherited item, accepting that money was wasted on impulse purchases, etc.

TWO: Honour your feelings

If you are feeling something when you look at or hold an item, it’s a valid feeling. Make sure you respect yourself during the process of letting go. Nothing is silly, nothing is shameful. Psychologists still don’t fully understand how the mind forms all attachments, so denying your feelings has no place in this process.

However, you are capable of changing the story you always tell yourself around the owning of an object. If you feel guilt looking at a jacket you never wear, but it was a gift from a friend – do you want to continue holding that guilt or are you ready to make room to feel something better?

THREE: Get the right help

You decided what is truly helpful during your decluttering process. Help can come in the form of a friend, time, a professional organizer, meditation, a dumpster bin, a donation centre, an online marketplace, a 30-day challenge, an online course, etcetera.

There is no one-size-fits-all solution for processing emotional attachment to stuff. There is beauty in believing that your decluttering process looks different from mine; that Joe’s looks different from Tammy’s. If you are here reading this post – you are already on your journey. Congratulations.

Your stuff doesn’t define who you are

Dealing with emotional attachment to stuff can feel painfully slow and confusing. Remember you ask yourself, why are you getting organized? It’s important to understand your why because it holds the power behind your motivation. The most successful people who get organized and stay organized are fuelled by a why that promotes internal motivation. You have to want to change and do something different, otherwise you are going to remain in that old story. Try our mini-crash course if you would like a deeper explanation in how to get started.